Assimilation involves absorbing individuality into total

1. Individuality of body mind is an appearance within the total atma that is isvara

2. Within this total the various beings are connected by order

3. This order is all pervasive, but brahman is what even pervades the order itself, brahman pervades space itself, hence brahman atman is limitless

4. Space is in fact inside brahman

5. There is no absence for space - space IS always. Everything I see hear taste touch smell know is in space, and space is in brahman, and brahman is the sakshi. Not the active knower, rather the samanya knower the knower who doesnt need to be a knower in order to know. 

6. In this manner the darshana is of isvara all the time, as maya sahita chaitan

7. Maya is and this maya is the shakti of brahman

8. See when there is a biscuit, the biscuit has material cause and intelligent cause. Both are brahman with maya shakti

9. The name and form are within maya and hence the jagat is a product of maya

10. Here the maya is within brahman, therefore the jagat is a product of brahman as the causal isvara

11. With eka jiva vada, the sleeper I am the cause , my maya shakti has produced this jagat, just like my nidra shakti produces dream world.

12. The maya shakti is such that it is fairness and infallible. I am fair and infallible in that avatar.

13. I am mother bhuvaneshwari in that sense  

14. Bhavani tvam dase my vitara drshtim sa karuna, iti stotum vanchan kathayathi bhavani tvam iti yah, tadaiva tvam tasmai, dishasi nija sayujya padavim, mukunda brahmendra sphuta makuta neerajita padam

15. So given I am both bhakta and bhagavan, what is needed to know, nothing

16. It matters how much bhagavan wants this body to livea and do things

17. Your job essentially is to wake up and acknowledge that isvara 

18. Thereon you become the agent of that isvara

19. Whatever nataka needs to be played is played

20. Honesty with isvara is what is demanded of the nataka

21. How long is not a question as you are made intensely convictioned to the point you dont even want to state it anymore or declare it , like you dont need to declare you are male or your parents are so and so

22. It is not something to be disturbed by analysis, its the order. I know it but it need not be recalled

23.  In reality you are timelessness

24. Whatever has been given to this body has been given by I

25. I am not this body

26. What is given is as per laws of karma alone

27. Knowing that via chidabhasa is not a pre requisite to doing things 

28. Not knowing here only reason it creates a chanchalatvam and discomfort is when chidabhasa forgets the true nature of oneself as sakshi and isvara

29. If chidabhasa always is aware of its own status as sakshi then it has no problem being chidabhasa temporarily

30. Remaining as sakshi I act as chidabhasa

31. Here I am immortal , I am not identified with body mind, so the longevity is not of me, its of the body mind relative to time, I remain timeless

32. Whatever be the length is minisculy miniscule

33. Being the mother of all possiblities, this jiva itself is a myth, there is no separate jiva at all

34. Chit is temporarily expressing as this body mind self complex, chit is isvara alone , jiva is brahman

35. Chit is mistaken to take on the properties of body mind etc. chidabhasa etc. and that is what is called as jivatvam, whereas that is totally incorrect , due to ajana alone that conclusion is being made

36. This thought is not a problem I can have as many such thoughts, I just need to constantly know that the thought is about illumined and not the illuminer I

37. Its the maya within me that I experience when I am asleep

38. Due the prarabdha the maya within me creates this universe in me and wakes me up

39. And I see this world in me

40. As per this mayas order this experience part will continue

41. It continues due to prarabdha

42. Prarbdha projects certain span 

43. It is not real. So I can also take infinite lives and kalpas those are also not real. There is no need to wait for an ending either , since there was never a real begining. 

44. The mithya maya , so no real world can be projected. Its exactly like a dream, so the pereniality of a dream does not make it not a dream, here the time itself will be a dream alone,

45.   The existence of maya shakti itself is disimiessed. From maya standpoint it can point to anything like time and so on, within its field it can be a queen or king, but beyond its field where even maya cannot reach is brahman in which there is no maya

46. In this way maya itself is crossed over and one goes beyond maya where maya cannot ever return nor was ever present

47. 

__PRESENT__PRESENT

Sakshi is sat chit ananta

Greater than any worldly Sukha, Dukha alternates is the pure chit. The one who is afraid of the travails and ups and downs of the mithya sharira and experience so sukha and dukha is ajnani alone, as when there is atma jnanam, then the atma is the adhistana chaitanyam, which is all pervasive and the reality of everything.

The reality of everything atma alone shines as wordly sukha, and the hiding of it in the mind acts a wordly dukha. This way the wordly drama is experienced within atma, with atma as the material and maker of it. The name and form knowledge with which atma is the material and maker is non separate from atma, and this reality is mithya reality in which atma is the adhistana and names and forms are the adhyasa. There is no name and form separate from atma, so one need not look for name and form separate from atma. All that is here is atma itself and here the name and form is non separate from atma. But it is to be known that in reality atma does not have any name and form. 

The future may include atma experienced with any sukha or dukha in a world sense, which is a mithya reality. Its beginning and end are also mithya, in fact beginninglessness and endlessness are also mithya. 

So therefore atma alone is there, there is no second. The saguna atma is mithya, that is all to be known. Once saguna atma is known as mithya and nirguna atma as satyam, then we can say that in reality atma is nirguna. And this nirguna need not be known, as what is known falls under knowingness, knowerness, knownness which are mithya , all the three are atma which is neither knower, nor known, nor knowledge, and is self itself.  Nirguna atma is quite clearly nirguna as the knower of all 3 states sakshi chaitanyam, here sakshitvam is also mithya. And here the isvaratvam karanatvam is also mithya, which is abhinna nimitta upadana karanatvam that is also mithya. Since I dont have any of those names or forms I need not search for anything. 

You cannot give up karma

You cannot give up karma, not because you are bound to karma, its because you were and can never be a karta. Karta is mithya, and atma is satyam, satyam is never connected with mithya, mithya is non separate from satyam. Satyam is pure clay. Mithya is pot , jug etc. 

Because the distinction is seen and atma is seen as satyam karma is never a problem. Karta is never a problem. 

The other fact is atma is anantam. Anantam is not a corrolary, its the svarupa of atma.

Its easier to understand sat and chit, atma is, atma is consciousness.

But anantam is a bit involved.

The method is as follows:

You use the shabda pramana to see that atma is anantam. Here the word see refers to understanding directly gained from shabda pramana, other pramanas like pratyaksha and anumana have no access to this understanding that only the shabda praman offers.

The pramana is the meaning of the mahavakya, the mahavakya and its meaning is itself the pramana. Just the eye and its vision (what is seen).

So here meaning of tat tvam asi helps us know atma svarupa is anantam , the word anatam is clarified.

How? By understanding tat pada. Tat pada is isvara lord, who is non separate intelligent and material cause. This lord is obviously satchit, but also this lord is by himself bigger than any bigness.

Imagine all of space, and isvara is the truth about space. Which means isvara is neither inside, nor outside space, in fact space is a derivative of maya the material cause, and this material cause maya is non separate from isvara. This automatically means this isvara is limitless wrt space time as being the very mother of time alongside maya. 
Now being the truth about maya, as maya is mithya, the nature of isvara is then of course anantam. The limitlessness cannot be a property of maya, as maya has no even being of its own. Only a being can have isness, and only what IS can be limitless. As it has to be 'something' to be limitless. Also limitlesness cannot have a limited being as its ashraya or its truth. Therefore the svarupa of isvara is limitless. 

In the tat tvam asi, the jiva, avasta traya sakthi is equated to this limitless existence consciousness that is the satyam, truth about maya sahita isvara, maya sahita isvara being mithya. Jivatvam is also mithya. Negating mithya, at the paramartha - atma is isvara, non dual reality, which is sat chit ananta svarupa, non dual , unchallenged, whole without a second. 

__PRESENT

Om

 Among the earthly mother and the mother of the universe who is more reverential 

It is indeed the earthly mother 

For she beareth in her womb and delivers with pain yet fondles and cries in joy her beloved child 

Accepts their faults and tenders to the child often sacrificing her humanly nature 

The heavenly mother holds all power 

Yet it’s the powerless human mother who fights against all odds

Her love is not just divine , it’s a force untold 

Its a continuation of the umbilical cord

She fed you in the wound , fed you post birth and feeds blessings forever 

Between the heavenly and the earthly mother

The earthly mother wins the battle 

As the greater of the two 

And so would heavenly mother agree 

For it’s her power that manifests as the human mother 

Om tat sat

Standpoints

 From the standpoint of individual and world I am the non dual isvara shakti

From standpoint of truth I am turiyam, here no questions arise

When questions arise I am isvara

When questions arise about my truth, it is said I am turiyam

The dialogue with isvara is seen as dialog with self

I see self itself as isvara

OM

OM

I am brahman

I only appeared as though as a jiva due to error and appeared to undergo transformations in time. In reality I am changeless. Now I appear as this bhakta praying to my own nature as bhagavan. 

OM

The Night of the Brahmastra

The night drew tight her fist; the heavens turned.
No star would look on me; I hid in shame.
Then Kama came, red-handed, crowned with scorn,
And drove me face-first into begging dust.

O depth of depths! My name was filth and loss.
I was a thing unfit to stand or speak.
My shield lay split; my blade forgot its truth.
I crawled, I wept, I cursed my very breath.

I loathed myself. The worms seemed nobler far.
The ground rose high; I lay beneath the low.
Each breath confessed my smallness and my stain.
The wheel rolled on and did not know my name.

No god replied. No dawn would own my cry.
Hope itself turned its face and walked away.
I was undone, unworthy even of fall—
For falling needs a height I did not have.

And there—
Where nothing else would answer,
Where even despair lay spent—
A stillness stood, stark, unsparing, bare.

My Teacher stood within that wordless hush.
He spoke no word; yet all instruction held.
He offered no escape, no promised light—
Only the truth that one last cut remained.

I took the final edge—unborn, uncaused,
Ajati-vada, keen before all time—
Not with hope,
Not with courage,
But because no other thing was left to do.

I did not strike at Kama, nor at self.
I cut the lie that said I was the maker,
That I had borne this world or held its weight.

The cut was clean.
The cut was sufficient.
That stroke itself was Brahmastra entire.

No fire followed.
No echo came.

And in that same plain instant,
Chains failed to close.
No karma found a place to stand.
The wheel stood still for lack of birth.

Kama stood emptied—
Not slain, but finished.

Only then—
Not joy, but breath returned.
Not triumph, but a great unburdening.

From dust I rose, not lifted, but restored.
My kingdom—long usurped—came back to me:
Not land nor throne, but sovereign inner ground,
Where thought obeys and peace stands sentinel.

There was a crown, yet none could see its weight.
There was a joy, yet quiet, firm, and true.
No shout proclaimed it; happiness sufficed—
A settled sun that does not need to blaze.

Now walk I soft upon the narrow rope,
High o’er the dust and clamor of the world.
I rule my step; I answer to the real.
No pride attends me; gratitude alone.

The night did not exalt me—
It returned me to myself.

The fall was dream.
The Teacher stood.
I woke.

The world itself was never born at all.